Jenna Lee

Interview

the basics

I'm a full-time college student majoring in criminal justice. My parents are not together, and haven't been since I was about 2 years old. I lived with my grandparents most of my teen years, and moved out when I met my boyfriend.

Highest level of educated completed: High school diploma and some college.

On my third quit. This is the farthest I have made it without a cigarette. Today I'm at one month. I have cravings when things get hard, but I keep reminding myself of all the things that I want to be able to do again, like swimming and hiking.

For the majority, yes. Many of them do smoke but we don't try to get each other to quit because it starts drama in my group. If one of us decides on our own to quit, the non-smokers offer help when needed.

They do now but I was able to hide it from them for two years. Then my mom caught me and within the next few days, everyone in my family knew that I smoked. Some shrugged it off, like they knew that I was going to do it, and others got really mad at me. I was still hearing the lectures up until I quit for the third time.

My mom and dad don't really care that I did smoke. They just feel that it's my decision and I'll decide for myself. They raised me in a way that I would learn from my own mistakes. They let me do what I wanted, and then would support me later.

Yes, I learned once I started to realize that I was hurting myself. My hair, skin, teeth, lungs, and basically every part of my body is suffering because of smoking.

Yes, very much. I have already done so much damage to my body by smoking. By quitting when I did, I hope to have my body heal itself some. I just hope that when it comes to me wanting to be a mother, that the damage I have already done won't effect it. I have learned that smoking can cause damage to my fertility, so I just have my fingers crossed that I will be able to be a mother.

the beginning

I started smoking to impress a group of people that I wanted to be friends with. I can remember when I first started, I didn't inhale. I thought that if I didn't inhale, I wouldn't be addicted. Well after a while, one of the guys saw that I wasn't inhaling and called me on it. I felt embarrassed and thought that I had to inhale to be accepted by these people. That night I went home and inhaled for the first time. I didn't cough like everyone said I would, but I guess that was helped because my parents smoked around me; I did get lightheaded but that passed. I continued to inhale and before I knew it, I was hooked.

When I first started, I got them from friends who bought them or whose parents bought them. After a while one of the stores started to sell without checking IDs, so I was able to buy them. Then when my mom found out that I was smoking, she would buy them in bulk for me because it was cheaper to buy them by the carton then by the pack and that way I wouldn't use my money for lunch on them.

I'm 21 now so I don't have that problem but before I turned 18 I was always making sure that I had enough to at least last me a week just in case I couldn't get my hands on any. When the store that I used to buy them at got caught and started checking IDs, I started sitting in front of stores asking complete strangers to buy me a pack. I would start to freak out if no one would help me buy them.

I never really saw any ads with someone smoking in them. I didnot pay too much attention to all that stuff. The influence came in part that my parents smoked and that these people that I wanted to hang out with were smokers, and I thought that I needed to fit in.

I wasn't really aware. I knew that my grandma complained all the time about my parents smoking, but I never knew how it would effect you. I did go through DARE in the 6th grade but I think that I was a little too young to be taught about it. I didn't pay too much attention. I do however remember telling my DARE officer that my mom smoked and she was just fine. But I didn't think about any of this when I started.

No, because I wasn't really aware. I don't know if it was that I didn't want to believe that something like a smoking could hurt you or that I just didn't care.

I think that when it came to peer pressure, I was being ignorant of the fact of what smoking would really do to my health.

the effects of smoking

• Health effects while smoking: Now that I look back, my health changed a lot. Until I actually paid attention to my health, I didn't really notice.
• Respiration: I have to use an inhaler when I go for a long walk or try to exercise. I can't hold my breath for more than 30 seconds under water.It makes it hard to do the things I used to love to do.
• Stamina: I get tired really quick. I used to be able to run the mile every Wednesday at school in less than 10 minutes; now I would be lucky to make it through a full lap without having to stop and sit down in 10 minutes. Even when I am carrying groceries into the house, I have to stop and rest after about 2 armfuls. I can't even make it up a flight of stairs without having a problem.
• Skin color: My skin is not a normal color. Especially where I held the cigarettes. On my right hand, my pointer and middle finger are actually a deep yellowish brown from the nicotine. It's embarrassing when I go to a job interview and I go to sign papers and the employer sees my hand. I've even had some customers comment on it.
• breath: My breath used to be so bad. I brushed my teeth 3x per day, and after I had a cigarette I would have a mint or one of the Listerine mint strips but it was still horrible. My family always commented on it, and I had one of my friends flat out tell me that my breath was really raunchy. Now that I have quit, it is still kind of bad, but it is a lot better than it was.
• teeth: My teeth are a dark yellow. I look at pictures of myself and my teeth are disgusting. When I look in the mirror, I start to have a self esteem drop because I don't like how yellow they are and I'm embarrassed that if I broke up with my boyfriend and was to go on a date with a guy, that the moment that I smile, he would run away! I'm going to reward myself when I reach 6 months smoke free with having my teeth bleached.
• Heart rate: My doctor said that I really needed to quit smoking because after a cardio workout for 15 minutes, my pulse was in the danger zone. She told me that it was the reason why I felt light-headed after a small workout. She was also very afraid of a heart attack possibility because of the heart problems that were already present and the fact that I was making it worse because of smoking. Not something that I wanted to be told at 18.
• Energy: I have next to none. I wake up at 7 am and go to class, take a nap at about noon, and go to bed at about 7 pm. That is on a day when I don't really do much except walking and driving my car. I'm 21, I should be able to pull the all-nighters that my friends and I used to do all the time, but I can't.
• Coughing: I have gotten better since I quit but I used to wake up in the middle of the night coughing so bad that I would have to use my inhaler. The coughing used to get bad when I would try to do any kind of activity. I was even coughing sometimes when I would take a drag.
• Mucus: I was constantly hocking a lugie. It was always so thick in my throat. I would try to drink water or soda to make it go away; it never worked. I still have mucus in my throat but have been getting better since I quit. Now I'm bringing up stuff from my lungs. It is not attractive to be spitting up green-colored stuff in front of guys; they actually get a really sick look on their face, like they are going to puke.
• weight change: I was at 120 when I started smoking. For my height that was really skinny. I was wearing a size 0 and loving it. But here I am 7 years later and wearing a size 11 to 13. I weigh in at 167. That weight is after I have lost 10 lbs after quitting. I know I'm going to put on a little weight once my body goes back to normal, but I figure at least I'll finally be able to work it off soon. I think that most of the weight gain was because I couldn't go and exercise because my lungs wouldn't allow me to take in as much air so I just sat around and did nothing.
• Mood: I have major mood swings. I'm not talking the normal PMS that we all hear women go through, I mean all the time. I can be having the best day one minute and the next be in the foulest most ugly mood. This happened the most when I would start to crave a cigarette when I was in class or out of them. It was like I didn't care whose feelings I hurt, just as long as I could have my smoke. When I quit, the mood swings got worse for the first two days, but now I very rarely have them.
• other: I have always been the type of person who would listen to what people said, take it into consideration, then do what I wanted. With how hard it was to stop smoking, I really kick myself for ever starting. I look back and realize that when I felt that smoking was the cool thing to do, if I would have looked around, there were way more people that didn't smoke. I didn't see that because I only looked at the people that I thought of as cool.

• Relationships (friends/parents/significant others): A lot of my friends and most of my family smoked, so it didn't really cause a problem by me smoking. After I left high school, I started to hang out with new people that didn't smoke and I felt bad for subjecting them to the smell and secondhand smoke. My relationship with my mom and dad didn't really change until I quit. Now I hate to go around them because I'm scared that I might start again and I really don't want to do that. My boyfriend doesn't smoke so he hated the fact that I smoked. We have been together for 3 years and he basically got used to it except when he had a headache, I couldn't smoke around him because it would get worse. Since I quit smoking, though, he has been showering me with compliments and tells me how proud he is of me for quitting. My cousins like to hang out with me again now that I have quit. When I was smoking, they wouldn't even get in my truck because of the smell.
• Sports or hobbies:I used to be a really outdoors person. If an activity involved being outside, I was there. Now I can't. It's hard when all my friends go up to the lake to swim. I can't really do anything except watch and stay in the shallow area because I know that if I swim too far out, I won't be able to make it back to shore. With school, I couldn't run the track anymore or play sports all too well. I was always having to sit and watch because I couldn't breath. I had to give up one of my favorite classes, dance. I loved learning all the new moves and going up in front of the whole school to perform. I loved the attention. But I learned that over time, I couldn't keep up with everyone.

quitting

Before this quit, I tried to quit two other times. The first time I tried cold turkey and made it less than 24 hours. The second time I tried with the patch and made it a little over one week. This time I quit with taking Wellbutrin and I've made it to one month.

The first time I was 18 years old, the second I was 20 years old and the third time was right after my 21st birthday.

So far three and I'm hoping that the number doesn't rise. It's hard but I'm trying my hardest to regain my life.

The first time my motivation was my little sister being born. I didn't want to smoke around her. The second time I tried to quit was because I felt bad about smoking and began to hate the taste. The third time, I just got really fed up with myself. "You have to quit for you" is what my doctor told me and it was the best advice I have had. I can't let myself down, and I'm determined to not smoke ever again.

Cold turkey, the patch, and Wellbutrin. One of my friends, as a joke, had given me the gum in lieu of a normal piece of gum, and it tasted so bad and made me sick to my stomach, so I didn't even consider that option.

Everything that has occurred healthwise since my quit are all things that will slow down, if not completely stop, over time, or so I'm told.

Since I quit, I have been sleeping better and have enjoyed going for walks but I haven't tried to do any of the things I used to do, so I'm not sure how my body will react to quitting. I have been told that over time, I should be able to do many of these things again and to do as much cardio as I can to help my lung capacity.

n/a

I really thought that I would have trouble. I thought that I would start again because of stress, emotions, or being around people that smoke. After the first few days, I was feeling very competent that I could do this.

I really didn't think that I was until I tried to quit. I never paid attention to how I was reacting to a craving and was ignorant to the idea. I learned really quick how addicted I was the first time I tried to quit and I couldn't believe it.

The first relapse was when I got really upset. I basically threw in the towel, then kicked myself afterward. The second relapse was due to me talking myself into smoking when I was around smokers, to help with the craving. Needless to say, I didn't stick with just socially smoking.

"It's my body and I'll do whatever I want to it whenever I want to" seems to be the phrase that is the most heard among my friends. Even the ones that are pregnant won't quit smoking even though it can hurt or kill the baby. It's really upsetting to watch your friend who is 8 months pregnant sit there sucking on a cigarette.

the picture

Scary but true. All of those things do happen. You can say "it wont happen to me" all you want to, but it will.

I had that "it won't happen to me" attitude going on. I would have looked at it, given it some thought, and smoked anyways.

parting words

If you smoke, quit now and if you're considering, don't. It is so hard to stop and it makes you stink and your teeth yellow and all kinds of things that do not make you attractive to others. Then there is the health thing. If you love doing anything that involves having to breath, smoking will eventually make it impossible to continue. This happens sooner than later, too. I see way too many of my friends from high school that had the attitude of "it won't happen to me" and all I have to say is that it may not happen in the same way, or at the same pace, but eventually it will happen to you. Please don't smoke; it is just as bad as using drugs in many ways. I wish that I would have never started.